closer to the clouds

27 November 2007

Stirring post...

Especially this part...

from Daniel T. Niles’ book That They May Have Life...

“Evangelism is witness. It is one beggar telling another beggar where to get food.
The Christian does not offer out of his bounty.
He has no bounty.
He is simply a guest at his Master’s table and, as an evangelist, he calls others too.”

This, among other related things in my current sphere, are haunting me.
It is a lovely haunting... more like an enticing request to participate... in something grand...with someone Grand!


26 November 2007

giving thanks

...for a multitude of blessings
...I am especially fond of these three

Untitled from vaporlife on Vimeo.


21 November 2007

snow day

Winter may finally have decided to grace us here in Colorado.
Monday it was 74 degrees, yesterday it was 43 degrees by about 9:30am and then the temp began to fall. Today it is supposed to get to 25 degrees and we woke to a frosty, snow covered world.

A snow day looks a bit different for Mark now that he is working construction...

No more lazy days at home. He has ditched the khakis for carharts!

But, here at home they are very much the same...

We have the Christmas music cranked, everyone is still in their pj's (yes, me too), the mixer and oven are in full swing and the house smells of fresh goodies.

I love snow days!


16 November 2007


A friend of mine just posted this poem on his blog...


by Maya Angelou

"When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'".I'm whispering "I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.

"When I say... "I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect. My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain...I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name."

I am stirred...
or maybe ashamed...

...probably because I have been the un-christian more often than I have been like Jesus to the world who judges "christians" in the ways she writes of. Why does their seem to be a tension between being fully authentic - a real person - and a devoted Christ follower? Where has the lie come from that the redeemed somehow trade in their humanity? And worse, why do I believe it?

I am stirred...
or maybe ashamed...

"... so I call on His Name."


15 November 2007


The other day Audrey did something that made me think... "My baby is beginning the transition from baby to toddler."

a growing interest in books

beginning to use a spoon

It has kind of snuck up on me and I was somewhat surprised by the thought and also by the actions that confirm the thought. Today, I was on the floor playing "camping" with Owen and Audrey was there to participate too. She would push herself up to a standing position, let go and throw her arms up in the air as if to say, "I AM DOING SOMETHING!" It is with bitter sweetness that I will say good-bye to these baby days.

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12 November 2007

Put them together and wha-da-ya got...
Not, bibbity bobbity boo... A peppermint latte - at home - that I didn't pay $5 for.
I am enjoying one right now and feeling very pampered.


then and now

My boys are changing so much.
Each day a sliver of this precious time of innocence and dependence slips away.

I was struck with this when I discovered the boys playing together today...

Ethan -4, Owen -2

It immediately reminded me of a picture I took more than 2 years ago, September of 2005...

Ethan - 2, Owen - 8 months

O Father, I treasure these days in my heart.

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07 November 2007

prince charming flirts with the dark side

By way of an update to my Prince Charming post...

Owen is experimenting with the word stupid.
I am not sure how a 2 year old processes these things but he has been trying it out on me. It goes something like this...

We are sitting at the table for lunch. Owen sits on one side of me and Audrey on the other. When I am turned away from Owen to help Audrey I hear... "stupid mama" - said under his breath as he looks at me from the corner of his eye with is head almost bowed (if you know Owen you know this look). I turned to him - as if I didn't hear and said, "Excuse me Owen" - not wanting him to see me be reactionary just yet. He says, "I luff you Mama!"

I could barely contain my laughter - which Mark and I shared whole heartedly at bedtime. O, the adventures of the 2-year-old's heart and mind - what a torrent it must be.

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a river

My heart has been in "river" mode this last week... strong currents ever rushing on and on.
I have many weighty issues competing for my hearts attention and my ability to order the currents of these things, so that I can pay attention to each issue as God may be inviting me to, is very challenging. I don't think I am distracted...maybe I am. Surely I am opposed - these are matters of the heart. (Interesting that my mp3 player died this morning while I was "putting on" the armor of God.)

I began thinking of things this way on my walk this morning. When I left the house it was almost sunrise. I was deeply impacted by the quiet of the morning... the peace. It was as if I was in stillness and I alone moved through it. At first it was almost unnerving. It was SO quiet. But then I found that this reality seeped into my very soul... as if somehow the currents of my heart stood still...

"He leads me beside peaceful waters... He restores my soul."

I think the things I ponder seem like they are riding a current because they are a mixture of desires and dreams... fears and veiled glories... pieces of a puzzle that don't yet fit together... things not easily "addressed." It is here I find myself most easily vulnerable with my Savior... places where answers are not readily apparent... where I lay myself open before him and follow Him beside the peaceful waters.

And where will this river flow? I ache to know and it keeps me close to my Shepherd.


06 November 2007

a gift for me

An Invitation...
5 Women...
and Sushi...


I enjoyed a delightful evening out last night.
It came about as the result of a wonderful morning of worship and fellowship on Sunday and a thoughtful invitation. (Thanks Deborah!)


01 November 2007

Prince Charming

Owen has been quite the charming young man these past few weeks. Without any prompting or urging, Mark and I regularly hear... "Mom, I luff you." or "I luff you, Dad." (He is a little lazy about some of his letter sounds, "v" sounds much more like "f"; this adds points on the cute meter!) He usually blesses us with his affection at a time that seems unexpected like in the middle of dinner or while he is playing cars.

Today, I have heard of his luff for me as well as: "Mom, you are beautiful" and "You are a princess, mama."

I am a little embarrassed to admit how much I love this. It isn't because I am starved for compliments - I get plenty of those from my beloved. It is because they come from his heart. They reveal to me that he is thinking about me and what he is thinking about me...and I love it.

I have thought that Owen is a tender soul from the earliest days that I began to get a glimpse of his heart. I think he and I are very much alike in this area. He and I share the ability to feel very strongly about something and to do so very quickly which usually makes little sense to others (because of our communication issues...different ones for him than for me) and usually involves tears or strong emotion (frustration/anger) of some kind. I pray that this will not cause him the pain and wounds that it has caused me in my lifetime...that God will protect him and shape this in him for His glory...that we will always be able to talk about it (or what it leads to) and he will feel understood.

Owen... I luff you!

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